'One kid shouted 'I SEE THE LIGHT!' and then sleepwalked into a wall': 20+ Hilarious things people said while sleeptalking

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Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
Sep 23, 2024 3:00 PM EDT

These people have said some pretty hilarious things while sleep-talking, and their friends or spouses overheard them!

It seems like every family has at least one person who sleepwalks or sleeptalks, and the rest of the group gets to make fun of them. It's just one of the enjoyable parts of living with people. It's highly amusing to watch someone who's clearly asleep stumble around or shout random nonsequiturs. For the people in these stories, they got to witness some hilarious moments that they'll remember for a long time to come. 

One person found their husband asleep with his arm in the air, and as they approached him, he announced that, "I like your bones." Another person overheard their brother sleep shouting "Stop brushing my teeth!" Most dreams don't make much sense anyway, since it's just random neurons firing in your brain, creating nonsensical adventures for you as you slumber. That only makes it funnier to hear these dreams make their way into the real world! Check out a bunch of funny anecdotes below from people who overheard their spouses, siblings, roommates, or family members yapping in their sleep. 

Up next, read a handful of tales from retail workers who can't get their customers to understand them, like one frustrated worker who insisted "I didn't make your drink wrong, Amy." 

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    Cheezburger Image 10407118848
    via Getty Images on Unsplash+

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    What is the funniest thing you've ever heard a person say in their sleep?
    via u/function158
  • 03
    yungScooter30 I was studying abroad in Italy. My (also American) roommate rolled over and said "Yogurt, am I right?" I laughed and quietly said "Haha yeah buddy." He, in his sleep, replied "Hey, man, you." It was hilarious.
    via u/yungScooter30
  • 04
    thawacct2590 "Wanna play dodgeball? I do. I wanna play dodgeball...dodgeball."
    via u/thawacct2590
  • 05
    chelmander My dad yells a lot in his sleep and said many a funny thing over the years. The best one I've ever had the pleasure of witnessing was: "W W W DOT COM"
    via u/chelmander
  • 06
    And when I say my dad yells in his sleep, I mean he YELLLLLLS. It was hilarious and still laugh about it to this day. The way he enunciated the Ws was just so good.
    via u/chelmander
  • 07
    yourfavoritevegan When I was about 8 years old, I woke up and felt sick. Naturally, I went to my parent's room to wake my mom up. I tapped her and she sleep-mumbled, "be quiet, the vegetables are still sleeping". For some reason, it freaked me the out. I went back to my room and started crying haha
    via u/yourfavoritevegan
  • 08
    zomboromcom A (male) classmate once confided that he apparently slept-walked into his parents' bedroom and screamed: WHERE'S MY BLUE DRESS?!
    via u/zomboromcom
  • 09
    verynoice6930 "this Bean is sacred"
    via u/verynoice6930
  • 10
    swank_sinatra My mom when I tried to wake her for her night job when I was like 14. "Mhhmmm....the oven." I'm like "The oven mom....?" ".....stupid You're fired." I was oven. dying.
    via u/swank_sinatra
  • 11
    openletter8 My Wife started giggling in her sleep. I whispered to her, "What's so funny dearie?" She answered, "My sister is riding on a frizbee... It's a fun recipe." She quickly dozed back off.
    via u/openletter8
  • 12
    e-s-co I woke up one night to my husband laying on his back with one arn sticking straight up in the air. He was dead asleep and I asked if he was ok. His response was "I like your bones."
    via u/e-s-co
  • 13
    tehvolcanic In college I had a roommate who would talk in his sleep occasionally. One time in the middle of the night he said "Tehvolcanic, Tehvolcanic | need to tell you something important." He sounded very earnest and I wasn't quite asleep yet so I said "Ok,
    via u/tehvolcanic
  • 14
    what is it?" Suddenly he was shouting and yelled "IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!" and was silent for the rest of the night.
    via u/tehvolcanic
  • 15
    die94itjf 'STOP BRUSHING MY TEETH' i think my brother has a chronic fear of toothbrushes
    via u/die94itjf
  • 16
    Su... My ex used to tell a story about me.. He got out of bed one morning and I sat bolt upright and turned my head in his direction without opening my eyes. Me: "Which console do you want?"
    via u/SuddenTerrible_Haiku
  • 17
    Him: "...xbox?" Me, nodding solemnly: "Mm, tastes better." Then I laid back down and continued snoring.
    via u/SuddenTerrible_Haiku
  • 18
    bonesxcookies "12-35-20-40-07-21" my father said random numbers in his sleep. The gambler in me can't help, I bet those numbers on the lotto. I didn't win.
    via u/bonesxcookies
  • 19
    spacelincoln My wife will have full conversations. She was upset that we have a state bird but no national bird. I reminded her about the bald eagle and she smiled and slept soundly.
    via u/spacelincoln
  • 20
    Gigantic_Idiot Before we got married, it was the middle of the night. I sat bolt upright, practically screamed " BROTHER, HELP ME, IM GETTING MARRIED!!!!!" then slammed back down onto the bed, dead asleep. My now wife absolutely lost it laughing.
    via u/Gigantic_Idiot
  • 21
    The funniest part of it all is I didn't even know it happened until she told me about it in the morning
    via u/Gigantic_Idiot
  • 22
    tec... I remember at a sleepover, one kid shouted 'I SEE THE LIGHT!' and then sleepwalked into a wall. They were very confused as to what happened when they woke up
    via u/technicalitrees
  • 23
    JacketsInJuly Occasionally I talk in my sleep. According to my wife I once said, Me: Are they in here? Wife: Who? Me: The lobsters.
    via u/JacketsInJuly
  • 24
    I've never seen the ocean or even eaten a lobster. No idea why I was concerned about them being in our room.
    via u/JacketsInJuly
  • 25
    meow_witch Former friend of mine used to crash at my apartment every weekend when we were in college. One weekend my then fiance decided to hang out on the couch instead of sleep, play video games, drink, etc so J stays in our room with me.
    via u/meow_witch
  • 26
    Never knew she was a sleeptalker, but got woke up in the middle of the night because she was poking me while chanting "T is for teeth".
    via u/meow_witch
  • 27
    billbapapa My son appeared in my bed in the middle of the night, no problem, he's a little kid. But he kept kicking me in his sleep. I tried to move him over and he uttered, "Face me Jedi." I was not prepared for that, so I left and slept on the couch.
    via u/billbapapa
  • 28
    kieranhill97 My girlfriend turned over the other night and said "this is the end"
    via u/kieranhill97
  • 29
    [deleted] One night my sister woke up our whole family screaming like a chimpanzee. She says she was dreaming that she was a zoologist & learned to communicate with the apes. Well, they turned and wanted to kill her SO she started screaming like a monkey at the top of her lungs.
    via u/[deleted]
  • 30
    SC487 My sister carried on a conversation with me about needing to go pick up Natalie from the airport. We only knew one Natalie and hadn't seen her in several years. I also called my wife "an illiterate Canadian" once in my sleep. She's neither illiterate nor Canadian.
    via u/SC487
  • 31
    Chasing_my_butt... "Chicken. My chicken. Not your chicken. My chicken."
    via u/Chasing_my_butterfli
  • 32
    he... My friend sang most of the Speed Racer theme song. I told him the next day I didn't know he knew so many of the words, and he said "I didn't either." He couldn't recite any of it past the first line.
    via u/herpty_derpty
  • 33
    Also, this doesn't fully apply, but one time my mom woke my dad up for work, and he jerked up and crossed his index fingers together facing her like a crucifix.
    via u/herpty_derpty
  • 34
    [deleted] Roommate in college was shopping in her dream "no thank you" "can I try this on?" "how much is this jacket?" "ooh that looks. good on you" It was so innocent and polite lol
    via u/[deleted]
  • 35
    [deleted] "NO MOM, I don't want an umbrella in my spaghetti"
    via u/[deleted]

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